Don't worry friends I am already basically certain that I must be on a FBI or CIA list somewhere thanks to my time working for the US Government as a Peace Corps volunteer in former communist friendly Mozambique, traveling to visit my cousin in Sarajevo during Thanksgiving 2000 or any other number of places I have been, people I have met or books I have gotten from the library. So my following comments although they will most likely be found by some supercomputer in Quantico and be deemed subversive or maybe even "un-American" or un-Patriotic need to be said no matter what un-marked prison in the underground network our wonderful government has helped to increase around the world I might end up in.
Dear Mr. President,
I go to Europe to backpack around for 3 1/2 months over late summer/early fall 2000 and all I hear is about the upcoming presidential elections, I get to Salzburg Austria giddy as a school girl to do the Sound of Music tour and there you are starting to cause confusion and chaos over some chad things, then I go home in late November and who will be the next president is still up in the air, then I escape, ASAP, to Mozambique in 2001 and soon after you visit me on your "African" tour and I am pretty sure you came back again at some point during my over 3 years in Africa (waiting for regime change before returning home) to attend another conference or something of that nature. Then I come here to Brasil and you are here also. At least the Brasilians like the other South Americans you will be running into these next few days know that you are the king of jokers, the shame of the "Lone Star" state, the emperor who has no clothes or brain for that matter and the next newest ex-President, a moment that couldn't come to soon. As a matter of fact your majesty according to my "The Out of Office Countdown, 2007 Calendar" that I got as a present from my father you Mr. President only have 22 months or more specifically 682 days to see how much you can ruin the world for the rest of us to clean up the pieces when you leave office to enjoy the riches from your investments in oil, arms and the rest.
So I humbly (look up humble in the dictionary, to do this you need to get a dictionary, so ask that secret service agent named Roger who you have wittily renamed Bub to get you one and then open it and go from a to b to c to d to e to f to g and don't go to i before you come to h and then using the same challenging alphabetical skills go to near the end of the h's till you find the word spelled h.u.m.b.l.e) ask you to stop following me around and read the following stories to see what the rest of the world, what I mean to say is the majority of the world thinks about you and your dynasty. Dynasty brings to mind another cheesy nighttime soap you might recall called Dallas in the land of your Spurs, Rangers and Stars where we would love for you to return and stay for good. Although you really aren't a cowboy but just play one on TV and in your head, we will let your imagination stay in control as long as it keeps your finger from the button and you from following me. How far do I have to travel to try and escape Coke, McDonald's Nike, Starbucks, the Bushes and the rest of these "Made in America" cysts growing abnormally around the world and forwarding the cause of globalization, global warming and neo-colonialism.
Finally, Mr. Prez, I know that you only talk to the MAN and don't have time for listening to "your" people or heaven forbid reading what the "leftist" media says about you but you might be interested in reading what your "fans" from Al Jazeera and the Latin American News Agency have to say about you. First, Al Jazeera published an article today called "Bush arrives to Brazilian protest" could it be sir that you weren't welcomed with open arms or as a "liberator"? Then your friends in Cuba, there must be at least one, oh yeah maybe those guys on that base that starts with G.u.an....something, from Latin American News Agency published an article entitled "LatAm Readies to Unwelcome Bush" To your credit you were probably already gassing the chopper to visit your buddies in South America before these stories were published, Only if that Minority Report movie were true you could have seen your being "unwelcomed" before jumping on your high horse, spurring it, yelling "yippee kaye mother f@c&er" and heading down to find Butch, Sundance and Chavez somewhere in the expansive continent of South America.
With warm regards your loyal (thanks for the craniotomy ala Hannibal) subject,
Blake H. Schmidt
Dear Mr. President,
I go to Europe to backpack around for 3 1/2 months over late summer/early fall 2000 and all I hear is about the upcoming presidential elections, I get to Salzburg Austria giddy as a school girl to do the Sound of Music tour and there you are starting to cause confusion and chaos over some chad things, then I go home in late November and who will be the next president is still up in the air, then I escape, ASAP, to Mozambique in 2001 and soon after you visit me on your "African" tour and I am pretty sure you came back again at some point during my over 3 years in Africa (waiting for regime change before returning home) to attend another conference or something of that nature. Then I come here to Brasil and you are here also. At least the Brasilians like the other South Americans you will be running into these next few days know that you are the king of jokers, the shame of the "Lone Star" state, the emperor who has no clothes or brain for that matter and the next newest ex-President, a moment that couldn't come to soon. As a matter of fact your majesty according to my "The Out of Office Countdown, 2007 Calendar" that I got as a present from my father you Mr. President only have 22 months or more specifically 682 days to see how much you can ruin the world for the rest of us to clean up the pieces when you leave office to enjoy the riches from your investments in oil, arms and the rest.
So I humbly (look up humble in the dictionary, to do this you need to get a dictionary, so ask that secret service agent named Roger who you have wittily renamed Bub to get you one and then open it and go from a to b to c to d to e to f to g and don't go to i before you come to h and then using the same challenging alphabetical skills go to near the end of the h's till you find the word spelled h.u.m.b.l.e) ask you to stop following me around and read the following stories to see what the rest of the world, what I mean to say is the majority of the world thinks about you and your dynasty. Dynasty brings to mind another cheesy nighttime soap you might recall called Dallas in the land of your Spurs, Rangers and Stars where we would love for you to return and stay for good. Although you really aren't a cowboy but just play one on TV and in your head, we will let your imagination stay in control as long as it keeps your finger from the button and you from following me. How far do I have to travel to try and escape Coke, McDonald's Nike, Starbucks, the Bushes and the rest of these "Made in America" cysts growing abnormally around the world and forwarding the cause of globalization, global warming and neo-colonialism.
Finally, Mr. Prez, I know that you only talk to the MAN and don't have time for listening to "your" people or heaven forbid reading what the "leftist" media says about you but you might be interested in reading what your "fans" from Al Jazeera and the Latin American News Agency have to say about you. First, Al Jazeera published an article today called "Bush arrives to Brazilian protest" could it be sir that you weren't welcomed with open arms or as a "liberator"? Then your friends in Cuba, there must be at least one, oh yeah maybe those guys on that base that starts with G.u.an....something, from Latin American News Agency published an article entitled "LatAm Readies to Unwelcome Bush" To your credit you were probably already gassing the chopper to visit your buddies in South America before these stories were published, Only if that Minority Report movie were true you could have seen your being "unwelcomed" before jumping on your high horse, spurring it, yelling "yippee kaye mother f@c&er" and heading down to find Butch, Sundance and Chavez somewhere in the expansive continent of South America.
With warm regards your loyal (thanks for the craniotomy ala Hannibal) subject,
Blake H. Schmidt
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